Friday, July 15, 2011

Day 284: "two, three, four, tell the people what she wore..."

It would seem that in ‘public pool world’ it is absolutely fine to check out both sexes.
You might even hold the gaze of one or the other.
But what’s really happening is that you’re looking at the men to decipher if they are on your team.
And you’re looking at the women to compare their bodies to your own.
This game can last all afternoon.  And it does.
I see it happening all around me.
It’s a people watching extravaganza.
It’s the envy parade.
It’s enough to never get you off your towel and into the water.
It's exhausting!
I have, only recently, become quite comfortable in my own skin.
33 years old…it’s about time, right?
This is my body.
I could do a lot more for it, quite honestly, but it’s alright.
I have curves.  But aren’t women supposed to have those?
I have imperfections. But doesn’t that make me human?
I have hair that looks like a mop after being in the water. But aren’t hats so stylish?
The point is, I feel it’s time to cut myself some slack.
I am not going to obsess about how I look.
Part of this vacation has been about me being nice to me.
And letting go of any unnecessary baggage that has been weighing me down.
(Insert butt joke here).
So with this mission comes the new-found attitude that I can’t worry about my ass at the pool.
I'm just not going to.
And guess what?  You shouldn’t either.
Because you have to have your own back, right?
(Pun intended).
It has taken me too long to discover that being yourself at all times is a beautiful thing.
Even in a bikini.
Even at the pool.
So what if they look?
Let them.
Let them have a nice, long glimpse at what healthy looks like.

3 comments:

  1. Pool rule number 1: If you are perfect (body, hair, smile, deja pret tan, etc.) just stay the fuck home. Don't you have a backyard or balcony you can sit in alone? Give the rest of us some peace.

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  2. First of all, I'm gonna need the address of this pool. :)

    Secondly, I couldn't agree more. Comfort in your own skin is the sexiest thing going, and letting go of worrying about what others think is about the most peaceful. win/win.

    Thirdly, if we were strangers and I had no clue about all of your smarts and talents and kindness, I'd be at that pool pretending to read a magazine and staring at you through my sunglasses. You're gorgeous.

    xo, r

    p.s. (check your fb mail - did you get my message a bit ago, just want to confirm your address. i can't remember if you moved). :)

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  3. Ah, c'mon. We are our toughest critics! I'm sure healthy looks good on ya! Healthy In Yellow! And you're right about the "game"!! Sooooo true!

    - mk

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