Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Day 282: Rondo Alla Turca

I was hesitant about taking days off to just stay in town.
I wanted to save them for another trip somewhere.
But my body was tired. Giving up on me.
I felt heavy hearted and without any creative center.
I knew that I needed to stop everything and rest.
So last Thursday I asked my boss for the week off, effective immediately.
I really thought I was going to crack.
I had knots in my stomach for no reason.
It frightened me, really.
I had to stop. I needed to just ‘be’.
And even though a funeral started things off, I am mid-way through ten consecutive vacation days and I feel some relief.
I spent the entire day alone.
Quiet and without any kind of rush.
I walked the neighborhood with a coffee until it started to rain and then came in to watch Milos Forman’s “Amadeus”.
Afterwards, because of the film, I felt like listening to Mozart.
I put on his 40th symphony, as I had learned parts of it once, and then I fell upon Rondo Alla Turca.
As soon as I heard it I had a flashback to one of my childhood recitals.
A girl who performed after me, played this song on the piano.
I recall how I had been transfixed by the sound of it.
It was so beautiful.
Like a rush of whimsical emotion racing right through me.
It lifted me. I was only a child, and it lifted me.
And today, as it played, I remembered every single note.
Every pause. Every change.
You have no idea how happy remembering the tune, twenty years later, made me feel.
Once again the cheerfulness of it raced around the foggy corners of my brain.
Waking it up.
And lifting it with a wave of peace that brought such a smile to my face.
When the song was over, I started to research it online, and I discovered it was Mozart's 11th piano sonata.
Of course.
My special number.
My constant reminder that I am where I need to be.
Today was a good day.

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